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():food jokes (113): 20 Reasons Throwing Up is Better than Dorm Food |
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| Posted by CrazyMan on 11-Aug-2005 | 20 Reasons Throwing Up is Better than Dorm FoodAfter you throw up, you feel better.
You can throw up whenever you want.
When you throw up, you don't have to wait in line.
Throw-up is always warm.
You don't have to sneak throw-up out of the cafeteria.
When you're throwing up, a bent spoon is an advantage.
You can lose weight throwing up.
You don't have to pay to throw up.
Throw-up is SUPPOSED to look like that.
When you throw up, you don't have to come back for seconds.
You don't have to throw up everyday.
Throwing up can never cause you to eat dorm food afterward.
You can throw up without a photo ID.
Throw-up is organic and biodegradable.
They don't ration throw-up.
After you throw up, at least you know what you've eaten.
Plastic throw-up is funny. Plastic dorm food is redundant.
You don't have to throw up the same thing five days in a row.
A dog will eat throw-up.
After you throw up, at least there's some taste in your mouth.
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| Posted by cody boles on 11-Aug-2005 | The New DipThere was a guy he was at a baseball game....
this man had terrible lepercy and his back was filled with pus and blood and all that...
well the guy beside him kept throwing up...
so the man with the disease said "i am sorry i know its me i will go"
the man looked at him and said "no its not you, you can stay"
the man with the disease said ok so he sat back down
later the man threw up again and the man with lepercy said "i will go i am sorry"
the other manh said no its not you just stay its ok" so the man stayed
then like 10 min. the man threw up again and the man with the disease said ok enough i am gonna go now. the other man said no don't go its not you just let me explain...the guy behind my keeps dipping his chips in you back...
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| Posted by Stockers on 11-Aug-2005 | Food + waterDeciding to eat healthier breakfasts, my brother-in-law declared that oatmeal would now be his cereal of choice. But after eating his first bowl, he told my sister, "I hope I develop a taste for the stuff. It goes down real rough."
"Well," she asked, "how long did you cook it?"
"You're supposed to cook it?" he said.
A man goes to the doctor and tells him that he hasn't been feeling well. The doctor examines him, leaves the room and comes back with three different bottles of pills.
The doctor says, "Take the green pill with a big glass of water when you get up. Take the blue pill with a big glass of water after lunch. Then just before going to bed, take the red pill with another big glass of water."
Startled to be put on so much medicine the man stammers, "My goodness, doc, exactly what's my problem?"
Doctor says, "You're not drinking enough water."
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| Posted by ryanstilesgirl on 09-Aug-2005 | Improving fry cooking timeIn January 1994, 'The Economist' magazine reported that one of Secretary of Energy Hazel O'Leary's success stories about government research scientists hired out for civilian business uses was the Argonne National Laboratory's helping McDonald's to find a way to speed up french frying. A team headed by physicist Tuncer Kuzay, who interrupted his work on advanced photons, placed sensors inside the frozen fries and was able to design special frying baskets to deal with the effect of steam created by melting ice crystals and to cut 30 to 40 seconds off each batch's frying time.
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():food jokes (113): A practical joke involving jello |
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| Posted by J W on 09-Aug-2005 | A practical joke involving jelloHere's a delightful treat someone once made for an office Christmas party:
A gelatin mold should be made with Knox Unflavored Gelatin and red food coloring. One would think that a flavorless food would not be at all difficult to swallow, but believe me, from the looks of people who inserted cold masses of gelatinous glop into a mouth that was expecting sweets, the experience is unexplainably horrifying! Some claimed to be nauseated by the feel of it; others politely swallowed.
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| Posted by Lewis W. Winn on 09-Aug-2005 | Food one-linerThe snack bar next door to an atom smasher was called "The Fission Chips."
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