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():crazy jokes (57): A Message From Your Computer


Posted by matthew o. travitz on 11-Aug-2005

A Message From Your Computer

You look really sexy in that...thing you've got on tonight. I

like the way your eyes are always open when you read your

E-Mail. When you type, it reminds me of a concert pianist

tinkling on her keys.

You really know how to push the right buttons to turn me on.

If I wasn't a computer, I'd show you what "Hard Drive" really

means!

But Alas, I'm only a bundle of circuits and wires, obeying

your every command. Yes mistress! I'll balance your cheque-

book. Yes mistress! I'll run your silly little program.

Don't get me wrong...I like the Master/Slave thing, but

maybe just once in a while you could show some

compassion? Maybe instead of just ramming the diskette in,

you could slide it in slowly, maybe even blow in the slot

first. And maybe instead of just using me and turning me off

when you're through, we could talk for a while afterwards?

I know other computers have hurt you in the past. But I'm

different! I may be a little slow, but I've got a big mouse!

So come on baby, don't fight it. You know you want it. I'll

just turn off the lights and . . . and . . . what? Ok . . .well, will

you at least think about it?

I'm so embarrassed,


Your Computer.
   

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():crazy jokes (57): pirate walks in to a bar


Posted by Mr Female on 08-Aug-2005

pirate walks in to a bar

a pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheels in his pants and the bartender says u know u have a steering in ur pants and the pirate says arg its drivin my nuts crazy
   

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