|
|
 |
|
 |
 |
| Posted by Lazerwolf91 on 10-Aug-2005 | Beer Nuts vs. Deer NutsHow can you tell the difference between Beer Nuts and Deer Nuts?
The Beer Nuts are about a dollar fifty and the Deer Nuts are under a Buck
|
7 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
| Posted by NY on 11-Aug-2005 | Born FreeA rabbit one day managed to break free from the laboratory where he had been born and brought up. As he scurried away from the fencing of the compound, he felt grass under his little feet and saw the dawn breaking for the first time in his life.
'Wow, this is great,' he thought. It wasn't long before he came to a hedge and, after squeezing under it he saw a wonderful sight lots of other bunny rabbits, all free and nibbling at the lush grass.
'Hey,' he called. 'I'm a rabbit from the laboratory and I've just escaped. Are you wild rabbits? 'Yes. Come and join us,' they cried. Our friend hopped over to them and started eating the grass. It tasted so good. 'What else do you wild rabbits do?' he asked. 'Well,' one of them said. 'You see that field there? It's got carrots growing in it. We dig them up and eat them.' This, he couldn't resist and he spent the next hour eating the most succulent carrots. They were wonderful.
Later, he asked them again, 'What else do you do?' 'You see that field there? It's got lettuce growing in it. We eat them as well.' The lettuce tasted just as good and he returned a while later completely full. 'Is there anything else you guys do?' he asked.
One of the other rabbits came a bit closer to him and spoke softly. 'There's one other thing you must try. You see those rabbits there,' he said, pointing to the far corner of the field. 'They're girls. We have sex with them. Go and try it.' Well, our friend spent the rest of the morning screwing his little heart out until, completely knackered, he staggered back over to the guys.
'That was fantastic,' he panted. 'So are you going to live with us then?' one of them asked. 'I'm sorry, I had a great time but I can't.' The wild rabbits all stared at him, a bit surprised. 'Why? We thought you liked it here.'
'I do,' our friend replied. 'But I must get back to the laboratory. I'm dying for a cigarette.'
|
8 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
():animal jokes (1719): Why did the koala fall out of the tree?... |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by Matt N on 13-Aug-2005 | Why did the koala fall out of the tree?...Why did the koala fall out of the tree?
Because it was dead.
Why did the second koala fall out of the tree?
Because it was hit by the first koala.
Why did the third koala fall out of the tree?
Because it thought it was a game and joined in.
|
12 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by Thai on 09-Aug-2005 | Q: What has four legs and an arm?A: A happy pit bull.
|
1 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by SexyChic04 on 14-Aug-2005 | Seeing Eye DogsThere's a guy with a Doberman Pinscher and a guy with a
Chihuahua. The guy with the Doberman Pinscher says to the guy
with a Chihuahua, "Let's go over to that restaurant and get
something to eat." The guy with the Chihuahua says, "We can't go
in there. We've got dogs with us." The guy with the Doberman
Pinscher says, "Just follow my lead."
They walk over to the restaurant, the guy with the Doberman
Pinscher puts on a pair of dark glasses, and he starts to walk
in. A guy at the door says, "Sorry, mac, no pets allowed." The
guy with the Doberman Pinscher says, "You don't understand. This
is my seeing-eye dog." The guy at the door says, "A Doberman
Pinscher?" He says, "Yes, they're using them now, they're very
good." The guy at the door says, "Come on in."
The guy with the Chihuahua figures, "What the heck," so he puts
on a pair of dark glasses and starts to walk in. The guy at the
door says, "Sorry, pal, no pets allowed." The guy with the
Chihuahua says, "You don't understand. This is my seeing-eye
dog." The guy at the door says, "A Chihuahua?" The guy with the
Chihuahua says, "You mean they gave me a Chihuahua?"
|
2 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by Frans Lemstra on 10-Aug-2005 | Of Elephants and MarshmallowsWhy did the elephant stand on the marshmallow?
Because he didn't want to fall into the hot chocolate
|
6 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
