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():funny definitions (324): Keeps informed


Posted by brandon issler on 09-Aug-2005

Keeps informed

Keeps informed on business issues: Subscribes to Playboy and National Enquirer.

Listens well: Has no ideas of his own.

Maintains a high degree of participation: Comes to work on time.
   

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():funny definitions (324): Backup -


Posted by Heaven on 09-Aug-2005

Backup -

Backup - What you do when you sight a skunk in the woods.

Bar code - Them's the fight'n rules down da local tavern.

Bug - The reason you is a giv'n for calling in sick.
   

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():funny definitions (324): Dictionary of


Posted by faulk t. poo on 09-Aug-2005

Dictionary of

Dictionary of Evaluation Comments

Some of you might like to know what the supervisor is really saying in all those glowing employee work performance evaluations s/he keeps cranking out.

WILL GO FAR: Relative of management.

SHOULD GO FAR: Please.

USES TIME EFFECTIVELY: Clock watcher.
   

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():funny definitions (324): The wife


Posted by Iain A. Hewitt on 09-Aug-2005

The wife

The wife says: I'm not yelling!
The wife means: Yes I am! I think this is important!

In answer to the question "What's wrong?"

The wife says: The same old thing.
The wife means: Nothing.

The wife says: Nothing.
The wife means: Everything.

The wife says: Nothing, really.
The wife means: It's just that you're an idiot.

The wife says: I don't want to talk about it.
The wife means: I'm still building up steam.
   

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():funny definitions (324): Competent:


Posted by Zak on 09-Aug-2005
Competent:
Competent: Is still able to get work done if supervisor helps.

Conscientious and careful: Scared.

Consults with co-workers often: Indecisive, confused, and clueless.
   

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():funny definitions (324): Keyboard: Where


Posted by Cronic U. Bobinstein on 09-Aug-2005
Keyboard: Where
Keyboard: Where ya hang your keys.

Software: Them plastic eatin' utensils.

Mouse: Whats eats the horses grain.
   

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