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| Posted by shelby on 13-Aug-2005 | Castration (Ouch!)Fred goes to a doctor and says, "Doc, I want to be castrated."
The doctor says, "Look, I don't know what kind of cult you're into or what your motives are, but I'm not going to do that sort of operation."
Fred replies, "Doc, I just want to be castrated and I'm a little embarrassed about talking about it, but I have $5,000 cash right here. Will you do it?"
The doctor says, "Well, okay, I guess I could make this one exception. I don't understand it, but alright."
He puts Fred to sleep, does the operation and is waiting at the bedside when Fred wakes up. "Well, Doc, how'd it go?" Fred asks.
"It went fine, just fine. It's really not too difficult of an operation. As a matter of fact, $5,000 is a lot to pay for such a simple task and I felt a little guilty about taking that much. So, while I was operating, I also noticed that you had never been circumcised, so I went ahead and did that, too. I think, it's really better for a man to be circumcised, and I hope you don't mind my..."
"Circumcised!" yells Fred. "That's the word!"
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| Posted by JELLOSA on 13-Aug-2005 | Expressing StupidityFew sandwiches short of a picnic
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| Posted by Rachael n. Everson on 13-Aug-2005 | Diner StoryA grizzled old man was eating in a truck stop when three Hell's Angels bikers walked in. The first walked up to the old man, pushed his cigarette into the old man's pie and then took a seat at the counter. The second walked up to the old man, spit into the old man's milk and then he took a seat at the counter. The third walked up to the old man, turned over the old man's plate, and then he took a seat at the counter. Without a word of protest, the old man quietly left the diner.
Shortly thereafter, one of the bikers said to the waitress, 'Humph, not much of a man, was he?' The waitress replied, 'Not much of a truck driver either. He just backed his truck over three motorcycles.'
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| Posted by Pedro Fonseca on 13-Aug-2005 | Ashes to AshesA guy goes to a girl's house for the first time and she shows him into the living room. She excuses herself to go to the kitchen to make them a few drinks. As he's standing there alone, he notices a cute little vase on the mantel. He picks it up and as he's looking at it, she walks back in. He says, 'What's this?' She says, 'Oh, my father's ashes are in there.' He turns beat red in horror and goes, 'Geez, oh, er...I...' She says, 'Yeah, he's too lazy to go to the kitchen to get an ashtray.'
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