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| Posted by Chapane on 08-Aug-2005 | CHEESE THAT ISNT YOURSWHAT DO YOU CALL CHEESE THAT ISNT YOURS?
NACHO CHEESE!
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| Posted by Michael R. Shocket on 11-Aug-2005 | VanillaA lady walks into a store and asks the clerk for a gallon of vanilla, a gallon of chocolate and a gallon of strawberries the clerk says i dont have any chocolate so the lady says ok ill take a quart of each and the clerk tells her again i dont have any chocolate so the lady asks for a pint of each and now the clerk is getting really mad and he tells her to spell the "van" in vanilla so she goes v-a-n so the clerk goes spell the stracw in strawberries so she goes s-t-r-a-w and the clerk goes spell the fuck in chocolate and the lady goes there is no fuckin chocolate and the clrek goes thats what i've been trying to tell you!
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| Posted by Lees on 11-Aug-2005 | Most dangerous Food!A dietician was once addressing a large audience in Chicago. "The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago.
"Red meat is awful. Soft drinks erode the stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG, and few of us realize the long-term harm caused by the pollutants in our drinking water.
"But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all. Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?"
A 75-year-old man in the front row stood up and said, "Wedding cake."
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| Posted by Smart Fool on 11-Aug-2005 | Chocolate ice creamA lady walked into a convenience store and asked the clerk for a pint of chocolate ice cream.
The clerk told the lady "Miss, we are all out of chocolate ice cream."
The lady says "Oh, okay. Give me a quart of chocolate ice cream."
The clerk says "Miss, I just told you we are all out of chocolate ice cream."
The lady says "Oh, okay. Give me a half gallon of chocolate ice cream."
The clerk had finally had it. He said "Miss, can you spell the van in vanilla?"
The lady looked puzzled but answered "Yes, v a n."
The clerk said, "Very good. Now can you spell the straw in strawberry?"
The lady still looked puzzled but answered "Yes, s t r a w."
The clerk said, "Very good. Now can you spell the fuck in chocolate?"
The lady answered, "There ain't no fuck in chocolate."
The clerk replied, "That's what I'v been trying to tell you!"
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| Posted by gamma on 11-Aug-2005 | LemonQ:What do you give an injured lemon?
A:Lemonade
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| Posted by Chris L. Johnson on 11-Aug-2005 | Knife and falkAn italian walks into a hotel in malta and finds he has no sheet on his bed so he tells the owner" i want a shite on my bed " the owner says you had better shit on the bed.
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