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| Posted by Aaron D. Fredrick on 09-Aug-2005 | Cow getting itLittle Johnnie is sitting on the fence, watching a bull with two cows.
The preacher walks up, and asks Johnnie what he is doing.
Johnnie replies, "I'm watching that bull fuck the black cow."
The preacher, aghast at the language, tells Johnnie that he should say that the bull is going to 'SURPRISE' the black cow.
Johnnie says, "OK." and the preacher leaves.
The next day, after church, the preacher is shaking hands with all the parishioners as they leave.
When Johnnie appears with his parents, the preacher kneels down, smiles, and says, "So, Johnnie, did the bull 'SURPRISE' the black cow?"
Johnnie replies, "He sure did! He fucked the white one!"
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Glaci
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| Posted by Hysteria82 on 09-Aug-2005 | Passing gearA kid on a skateboard is being pulled down the sidewalk by his dog, which he's holding onto by the tail.
A woman stops him saying, "Sonny, couldn't you hold onto him some other way?"
"Yeah, I could," says the kid. "I could grab him by the balls, but I save that for passing gear!"
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by BreeBrown
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| Posted by Bri6285 on 09-Aug-2005 | Children's ProverbsA first grade teacher collected well known proverbs.
She gave each child in her class the first half of a proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb.
Their insight may surprise you.
Better to be safe than...punch a 5th grader.
Never underestimate the power of...termites.
You can lead a horse to water but...how?
Don't bite the hand that...looks dirty.
No news is... impossible.
A miss is as good as a... Mr.
You can't teach an old dog new... math.
If you lie down with dogs, you'll... stink in the morning.
Love all, trust... me.
The pen is mightier than the... pigs.
An idle mind is... the best way to relax.
Where there's smoke there's... pollution.
A penny saved is... not much.
Don't put off till tomorrow what...you put on to go to bed.
Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and... you have to blow your nose.
None are so blind as... Stevie Wonder.
Children should be seen and not... spanked or grounded.
If at first you don't succeed... get new batteries.
You get out of something what you... see pictured on the box.
When the blind leadeth the blind... get out of the way.
Submitted by Curtis
EDited by calamjo
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| Posted by Big Dadddy on 09-Aug-2005 | What is that?Little Bobby sat in the bathroom talking to his mother as she was taking a bath.
She got up to dry herself when Bobby noticed something.
With a puzzled look on his face he asked his mother, "Mommy what is that?"
She replied, "That is where Daddy hit me with an ax."
Then Bobby replied, "No shit! Right in the pussy?"
Submitted by calamjo
Edited by Yisman
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| Posted by Chris Dutto on 09-Aug-2005 | Daddy JonnyLittle Johnny came running into the house and asked, "Mommy, can little girls have babies?"
"No," said his mom, "of course not."
Little Johnny then ran back outside and his mom heard him yell to his friends, "It's okay, we can play that game again!"
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by BreeBrown
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| Posted by Rylee Angel on 09-Aug-2005 | Johnny's pussyAt school one day the teacher heard cat noises coming from the class, and she discovered little Johnny had a cat up his pants.
She said, "Why have you got your cat at school?"
Little Johnny started crying, "I woke up this morning to hear the mailman tell my mommy, 'I'm gonna eat your pussy today!'"
Submitted by calamjo
Edited by Curtis
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