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():nerd jokes (650): De Cock Fight


Posted by Edward Haskett on 13-Aug-2005

De Cock Fight

The South Carolina State Police received reports of illegal cock fights being held out in the parish near Goose Creek, and duly dispatched Detective Thibideaux to investigate. Thibideaux reported to his sergeant the next morning.

"Dey is tree main groups in dis cock fightin," Thibideaux began.

"Good work Thibideaux! Who dey be?" the sergeant asked. Thibideaux replied confidently, "De Polacks, de Cajuns, and de Mafia."

Puzzled, the sergeant asked, "How you find dat out in one night?"

"Well," said Thibideaux, "I went down and done seed dat cock fight,I knowed de Polacks was involved whan a duck was entered in de fight."

The sergeant nodded. "Oh yeah, l see dat, but what 'bout de others?"

Thibideaux intoned knowingly, "Well, I knowed de Cajuns was involved whan sumbody bet on de duck."

"Ah," sighed the sergeant. "Dat be making some sense. How you deduce dat de mafia be involved?"

"De duck, he won."


   

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():nerd jokes (650): Can I Take His Place?


Posted by Emily P. Giles on 13-Aug-2005

Can I Take His Place?

An atoorney telephoned the governor just after midnight, insisting that he talk to him regarding a matter of the upmost urgency.

An aide eventually agreed to wake up the governor.

"So, what is it?" grumbled the governor

Judge Garber has just died" said the attorney "and I want to take his place"

The governor replied; "Well it's OK with me if it's OK with the undertaker."


   

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():nerd jokes (650): Wishes in the Desert


Posted by johnny g on 13-Aug-2005

Wishes in the Desert

Three men were trekking through the desert and came across a magician. The magician was standing at the top of a slide. The magician than said, ''You may each go down the slide, asking for a drink. When you reach the bottom of the slide you shall land a a huge glass of that drink.

The first man went down yelling, ''Beerrr!!!'' Plop! He landed in a glass of beer.

The second guy went down the slide yelling,''lemonadeee!!!'' Plop! He landed in a glass of lemonade.

The third guy went down the slide yelling ''wheeeeeeeee!!!'''


   

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():nerd jokes (650): Idiot Chicken Farmer


Posted by Lady Love on 13-Aug-2005

Idiot Chicken Farmer

An idiot decides to start up a chicken farm, so he buys a hundred chickens to get up and running.

A month later he returns to the dealer to get another hundred chickens because the first lot had died.

Another month passes and he's back at the dealers for another hundred chickens, "I think I know where I'm going wrong" he tells the dealer,

"I think I'm planting them too deep."



   

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():nerd jokes (650): Information Please


Posted by Chez Bez on 13-Aug-2005
Information Please
A young man called information. "I'd like the number for Jennifer Smith in Atlanta," he said.

"There are multiple listings for that name," said the operator. "Do you have a street name?"

"Well, uhhhh," said the young man, "most people just call me Bubba."


   

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():nerd jokes (650): Hunting Accident


Posted by Whilicher on 13-Aug-2005
Hunting Accident
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. His eyes are rolled back in his head and he doesn't seem to be breathing. The other hunter takes out his cell phone and calls for help.

He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?"

The operator, in a calm voice, says: "Just take it easy. First, let's make sure he's dead."

There is silence on the phone, then a shot is heard and the hunter's voice comes back on the line. "OK," he says, "now what?"


   

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