|
|
 |
|
 |
 |
| Posted by Alex Alex on 09-Aug-2005 | DivorcingAndy walked into the neighbourhood bar and announced that he was divorcing his wife.
The bartender asked why.
"Well," Andy said, "Yesterday was her birthday, so I took her to the fanciest restaurant in town."
"So?" the bartender replies.
"So I order a bottle of their best champagne, and I made a toast to the best woman a man could have."
"What's wrong with that?"
"Four waiters joined in."
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Yisman
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
| Posted by Angel S. Pecherskaya on 09-Aug-2005 | 1/2 of eachThere was this guy who was 1/2 Irish, 1/2 Scottish.
He wanted a drink but he couldn't bring himself to buy one.
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Curtis
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by BRADY COLLINS on 09-Aug-2005 | Can't say noTwo life-long friends were enjoying a few pints down their local bar, when one said to the other, "If I ask you a question, will you promise to answer me honestly?"
"Yeah, sure thing," replied his friend, "Fire away."
"Well," said the first guy, "Why do you think all the guys around here find my wife so attractive?"
"It's probably because of her speech impediment," replied the second guy.
"What do you mean her speech impediment?" inquired the first fellow, "My wife doesn't have a speech impediment!"
"Well," replied his friend, "You must be the only guy who hasn't noticed that she can't say NO!"
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Yisman
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by A J Picozzi on 09-Aug-2005 | DentistA guy and a gal meet at a bar.
They get along so well that they decide to go to the girl's place.
A few drinks later, the guy takes off his shirt and then washes his hands.
He then takes of his trousers and washes his hands again.
The girl has been watching him and says, "You must be a dentist."
The guy, surprised, says "Yes....how did you figure that out?"
"Easy," she replied, "you keep washing your hands."
One thing led to another and they make love.
After they are done, the girl says, "You must be a really good dentist."
The guy, now with a boosted ego says, "Well yes, I'm a good dentist. How did you figure that out?"
"I didn't feel a thing!"
Submitted by bennto
Edited by Calamjo
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by I don't have a penis on 09-Aug-2005 | Infamous studAn infamous stud with a long list of conquests walked into his neighborhood bar and ordered a drink.
The bartender thought he looked worried and asked him if anything was wrong.
"I'm scared out of my mind," the stud replied. "Some pissed-off husband wrote to me and said he'd kill me if I didn't stop fucking his wife."
"So stop," the barkeep said.
"I can't," the womanizer replied, taking a long swill. "The prick didn't sign his name!"
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Glaci
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by Katie P. Kromwell on 09-Aug-2005 | Great barTwo guys wandered into a bar.
One of the men shouted to the barkeeper, "Hiya, Mike, set 'em up for me and my pal here."
Then he turned to his slightly dim partner and boasted, "This is a great bar. For every two drinks you buy, the house gives you one. And the pinball machines in the back are free!"
"That's not so great," responded the friend. "There's a bar across town that'll match you drink for drink, and you can get laid in the back for free."
"Where is this place?" the first guy exclaimed.
"Oh, I don't know," the dim fellow replied, "But my wife goes there all the time."
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Curtis
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
