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| Posted by regina on 09-Aug-2005 | Drunked and BlondeAfter a really good party a man walks into a bar and orders a drink.
Already drunk and delirious, the man turns to the person sitting next to him and says, ''You wanna hear a blonde joke?''
The person replies, ''I am 240 pounds, world kickboxing champion and a natural blonde. My friend is 190 pounds, world judo champion and is a natural blonde. And my other friend is 200 pounds, world arm wrestling champion and is also a natural blonde.
Do you still want to tell me that blonde joke?''
The man thinks for a while and replies, ''Not if I have to explain it three times.''
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| Posted by Jaz on 09-Aug-2005 | Karate ChopThere was a little guy sitting at a bar drinking a beer. A while later a huge guy walked into the bar and he went up to the little guy and karate chopped him in the back. The little guy fell off his bar stool and when he got up the big guy said, ''That was a karate chop from Korea.''
The big guy went to the restroom and the little guy ordered himself another beer. About 20 minutes later the big guy came back and karate choped the little guy in the back again. The little guy got up and dusted himself off and the big guy told him,''That was a karate chop from China.''
The little guy got up and decided he wasn't going to take any more of this, so he left the bar. About an hour later the little guy comes back to the bar and he hits the big guy in the back. The big guy is knocked out cold and he's on the floor. The little guy tells the bartender , ''Tell him that was a crowbar from Sears!''
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| Posted by Christopher E. Draughn on 09-Aug-2005 | Sexy TimepieceA man is sitting at a bar one night, wearing a fancy new watch, covered with buttons and lights and dials. The woman next to him says, “Wow, that's a really fancy watch.”
“Thanks, says the guy, “It's the cutting edge of technology. I can telepathically ask this watch anything I want to know, and it'll answer me, telepathically.”
“Rubbish, you're having me on,” says the girl.
“No, it's true,” says that guy. “Look, tell you what, I'll prove it. I'll ask it if you've got any panties on.” The guy scrunches up his eyes for a moment, as if concentrating hard to talk to his watch, then opens them and says, “Nope, it says you haven't got any panties on.”
“Well, it's wrong,” says the girl, “I do have panties on.”
”Damn,” says the guy, slapping his watch, “it's an hour fast!”
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| Posted by woman driver on 09-Aug-2005 | Self-ExplanatoryAn Irishman walks out of a bar.
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| Posted by Hoochie on 09-Aug-2005 | Give Me A DoubleSo this guy walks into a bar and says, “Gve me two beers.”
The bartender obliges him.
The guy looks into his wallet and says, “Give me two more beers.”
So the bartender gives him two more beers. The man went on like this until he had put down ten beers, and keeps on going in his wallet and asking for two more beers.
So the bartender asks, “What's in your wallet that you keep looking at?”
So the man opens his wallet and says, “The more I drink, the prettier my wife gets.”
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