|
|
 |
|
 |
 |
| Posted by Peytra on 09-Aug-2005 | Duck HuntingA duck hunter killed four ducks. He put them into his bag and began to walk home. The game warden stopped him and said, "So, your a duck hunter?"
"Yes sir, I am"
The warden sticks his thumb up the first duck's ass and says, " This duck is from New York, do you have a New York hunting license?"
The hunter replies, "Yes I do." and he shows it.
The warden checks the other ducks, the same way, and says, "My, my, you have ducks from NY, VT, CT and NH! Where are you from?"
The hunter turns around, bends over and pulls down his pants, and says, "I don't know...why don't you tell me?"
|
1 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
| Posted by gabriel on 09-Aug-2005 | Funny Limo DriverA Cardiologist came up with a new operating procedure that would cut down the time that heart surgery would take and would cause less trauma to the patient. He was praised by his peers when he presented it at a convention in Washington D.C. He was also paid $50,000 to present his findings.
The cardiologist did a few more of these presentations and realized that it would be more lucrative to do lectures on his findings rather than continue to work as a surgeon. So he decided to do the lectures full-time. He hired a driver and purchased a limousine.
One day, after he'd been doing the lecture circuit for about 6 months, his driver turns to him and says, "You know... This is completely unfair."
"What do you mean?" asks the surgeon.
"Well, you get paid $50,000 every time you do this lecture and that's more than I get paid in a year," replies the driver.
The surgeon explains to him that it is a very complicated procedure and that he is the only person that can give this lecture.
"That's not true. I can do your lecture blindfolded. I have seen you do your lecture so many times that I know it by heart," says the driver.
"Well if that's the case, I'll tell you what. You do this lecture and you can keep the $50,000 if you do it right." replies the surgeon.
The driver replies, "Ok. You're on."
So when they arrive at the lecture hall, the surgeon and the driver change coats and the surgeon puts on the driver's hat and sits in the back of the room.
The driver nails the presentation. Not only that, he also answers all the questions without any problems. Just when the driver thinks he's done, an audience member, wearing a lab coat and tape covered glasses stands up and asks a complex question that the driver is not able to answer.
"You know..." says the driver, "I have done this lecture 287 times and I have never been asked such a stupid question. As a matter of fact, that question is SO stupid that I am going to let my driver answer it."
|
1 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by Phil McRak on 10-Aug-2005 | FishQ: What did the fish say when he ran into the wall?
A: Dam.
|
5 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by Lesley A. Salton on 12-Aug-2005 | Small PenisThis couple has been dating for about four months, but the guy had been afraid of making any sexual advances because of his tiny organ.
Finally, he gets up his courage and takes her to a secluded spot in his car. While they are kissing, he opens his zipper and guides her hand onto his penis.
"No thanks," the girl says. "You know I don't smoke."
|
3 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by Insults -r- us on 14-Aug-2005 | Little IndianA young indian wants to learn how indians get their names so he
goes to chief sitting bull and asks him,
"Where do we get our names ?" to which the chief replies, "When
child is born chief go out of teepee and first thing chief sees
child named. If chief sees swooping hawk child named swooping
hawk, if chief sees a running bear then child named running
bear, so tell me Two Dogs Fucking why do u ask?"
|
2 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
