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| Posted by Jeremy M. Fouquet on 09-Aug-2005 | Gravity -Gravity - It's not just a good idea, it's the LAW!
Why be difficult, when with a bit of effort, you can be impossible?
Life is too complicated in the morning.
All I want is less to do, more time to do it, and higher pay for not getting it done.
The Schizophrenic: An Unauthorized Autobiography
Nobody's perfect. I'm a Nobody.
My wife said "If you go hunting or fishing one more time I'm going to leave you" ...I'm sure going to miss her.
Ask me about my vow of silence.
Today's subliminal message is: ( )
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| Posted by Lil Zane C. Rios on 09-Aug-2005 | My karmaMy karma ran over your dogma.
I brake for... wait... AAAH! NO BRAKES!!!!!
A fool and his money are a girl's best friend.
I'm not driving fast-just flying low.
Help starve a feeding bureaucrat.
My other vehicle is a Romulan Warbird!
Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery.
"I is a college student."
If you can read this, I can hit my brakes and sue you.
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| Posted by Bernard Z. Elkwood on 09-Aug-2005 | Those whoThose who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
He's not dead, he's electroencephalographically challenged.
She's always late. Her ancestors arrived on the Juneflower.
You have the right to remain silent....Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges.
Honk if you love peace and quiet.
Nothing is fool-proof to a sufficiently talented fool.
A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
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| Posted by Sara Beth on 08-Aug-2005 | Stay in this circleA woman driver bumped into a guy's car and did a fair amount of damage. The male driver asked why she did it, and she replied, "Because I wanted to. That's all the reason I need."
Then the driver said, "You ignorant bitch! Stand in this circle and don't move, then I will mess up your car to teach you a lesson!"
He started by hitting it with a bat, but the blonde started laughing, so the driver turned around, and she stopped laughing.
Then he started ripping up the seat, and again she started laughing, so he turned around, at which point the blonde stopped laughing again.
Then he started messing up the whole car then she started laughing again, so the driver finally asked her why she was laughing and she said, "Well every time you had your back turned I stepped ouy of the circle, so there!"
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| Posted by Nuttygryl on 09-Aug-2005 | "Time is"Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately it kills all it's students!"
"According to my calculations the problem doesn't exist."
"Pride is what we have. Vanity is what others have."
"How Can I Miss You if You Won't Go Away?"
Seen on a woman's car: "Men call us birds, we pick up worms"
"Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than they appear."
"Give me ambiguity or give me something else."
"Why is 'abbreviation' such a long word?"
"I like you, but I wouldn't want to see you working with sub-atomic particles."
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| Posted by scotty on 09-Aug-2005 | A cubicleA cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
If at first you do succeed, try not to look astonished.
Help wanted telepath: you know where to apply
I'm just driving this way to get you mad.
Keep honking, I'm reloading.
Hang up and drive.
Guns don't kill people, postal workers do.
Ask me about microwaving cats for fun and profit.
I said "no" to drugs, but they just wouldn't listen.
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