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| Posted by Hells Littlest Angel on 12-Aug-2005 | Holy CamelA Priest, a Nun, and a Camel are crossing the desert.
The camel falls dead.
Before I die the father says, "I would like to see a woman naked. So the nun takes off all her clothes.
She then says, "before I die i would like to see a man naked. So the father takes off his clothes. She looks at his penis and says, "My God!! What is that for?"
He says "You stick it in a hole and it brings forth life."
The nun replies, "Then how about you stick it up that camels ass and let's get the hell out of here!"
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| Posted by Brid Edwards on 12-Aug-2005 | Anagrammar!George Bush: When you rearrange the letters: He Bugs Gore
Dormitory: When you rearrange the letters: Dirty Room
Evangelist: When you rearrange the letters: Evil's Agent
Desperation: When you rearrange the letters: A Rope Ends It
The Morse Code: When you rearrange the letters: Here Come Dots
Slot Machines: When you rearrange the letters: Cash Lost in Em
Animosity: When you rearrange the letters: Is No Amity
Mother-in-law: When you rearrange the letters: Woman Hitler
Snooze Alarms: Wen you rearrange the letters: Alas No More Z's
A Decimal Point: When you rearrange the letters: I'm a Dot in Place
The Earthquakes: When you rearrange the letters: That Queer Shake
Eleven plus two: When you rearrange the letters: Twelve plus one
President Clinton of the USA: It can be rearranged into: To Copulate he finds
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| Posted by ScoggyDogg on 12-Aug-2005 | Terrorism: Doing our part...Rarely do we receive a chain letter I feel compelled to pass on, but under the circumstances....
President Bush has asked that we unite for a common cause.
Since the Taliban cannot stand nudity, and consider it a sin to see a naked woman that is not their wife, tomorrow night at 7:00 all peace-loving women between the ages of 21 & 35 are asked to walk out of their house completely naked to help weed out any neighborhood terrorists. Circling your block for one hour is recommended for this anti-terrorist effort.
All men should position themselves in lawn chairs in front of their house to prove they think it's ok to see other women nude. (A cold six-pack at your side is further proof of your anti-Taliban sentiment.)
And to do my part, I'm buying stickers for all women who participate.
Stop by my house so I can put the sticker on you to show you helped!
Names and addresses of non- participants should be sent to CIA Headquarters, Langley, Virginia.
The United States and Canada appreciate your efforts and applaud you!
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| Posted by Adam on 12-Aug-2005 | Get a hot mama!A 87 year-old man went to the doctor to get a physical.
A few days later, the doctor saw the man walking down the street with a gorgeous young lady on his arm.
A couple of days later, when the old man had an appointment with the doctor again, the doctor said, "You're really doing great, aren't you?"
The man replied, "Just doing what you said doctor, "Get a hot mama and be cheerful."
The doctor said, "I didn't say that!...
I said you have got a heart murmur. Be careful!"
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What's the best thing about growing old?
You get to hide your own Easter eggs.
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| Posted by TAISHA on 12-Aug-2005 | Good Girls - Bad GirlsGood girls say "thanks for a wonderful dinner"...
Bad girls say, "what's for breakfast?"
Good girls never go after another girl's man...
Bad girls go after him AND his brother.
Good girls wear white cotton panties...
Bad girls don't wear any.
Good girls wax their floors...
Bad girls wax their bikini lines.
Good girls loosen a few buttons when it's hot...
Bad girls make it hot by loosening a few buttons.
Good girls make chicken for dinner...
Bad girls make reservations.
Good girls blush during bedrooms scenes in movies...
Bad girls know they could do better.
Good girls never consider sleeping with the boss...
Bad girls never do either, unless he's very, very rich.
Good girls believe you're not fully dressed without a strand of pearls...
Bad girls believe that you are fully dressed with JUST a strand of pearls.
Good girls love italian food...
Bad girls love italian waiters.
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| Posted by Scott D. Bibee on 12-Aug-2005 | Guess the instructions.Read the 10 to-do instructions and then scroll for the answer - NO CHEATING!
1. Back straight, knees bent, feet shoulder width apart.
2. Form a loose grip.
3. Keep your head down.
4. Avoid a quick back swing.
5. Stay out of the water.
6. Try not to hit anyone.
7. If you are taking too long, please let others go ahead of you.
8. Don't stand directly in front of others.
9. Quiet please... while others are preparing to go.
10. Don't take extra strokes.
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Very good. Now flush the urinal, go outside, and tee off!
(From a sign posted at a local golf course restroom :)
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