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| Posted by Tammy Roy on 09-Aug-2005 | Horsey ridesThat little bastard Little Johnny was passing his parents bedroom in the middle of the night in search of a glass of water. Hearing a lot of moaning and thumping, he peeks in and catches his parents in the act.
Before his Dad can even react, little Johnny exclaims, 'Oh boy! Horsey ride. Daddy can I ride on your back?'
Daddy, relieved that Johnny was not asking more uncomfortable questions and seeing the opportunity not to break his stride, agrees.
Johnny hops on and daddy starts going to town. Pretty soon his mummy starts moaning and gasping and Johnny cries out, 'Hang on tight, Daddy. This is the part where me and the milkman usually get bucked off!'
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| Posted by Mitchy Dee on 09-Aug-2005 | CircumspectionTwo five-year-old boys are standing at the toilet to piss.
One says, 'Your thingy doesn't have any skin on it.'
'I've been circumcised,' the other one says.
'What's that mean?'
'It means they cut the skin off at the end.'
'How old were you when it was cut off?'
'My mum said I was two days old.'
'Did it hurt?'
'You bet it hurt. I couldn't walk for a year.'
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| Posted by lil dude on 09-Aug-2005 | She fakes itA little girl is in line to see Santa. When it's her turn, she climbs up on Santa's lap and Santa asks,
'What would you like me to bring you for Christmas?'
The little girl replies,
'I want a Barbie and a G. I. Joe doll.'
Santa looks at the little girl for a moment and says,
'I thought Barbie comes with Ken.'
'No,' the little girl replies, 'She comes with G.I. Joe, she fakes it with Ken.'
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| Posted by coucool slim (moe dog) on 09-Aug-2005 | New BikeOn Christmas morning, a cop on horseback is sitting at a traffic light and next to him is a kid on his shiny new bike.
The cop says to the kid,
'Nice bike you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?'
The kid says, 'Yeah.'
The cop says, 'Well next year, tell Santa to put a tail light on that bike.'
The cop then proceeds to issue the kid a $20 bicycle safety violation ticket.
The kid takes the ticket and before he rides off he says,
'By the way, that's a nice horse you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?'
Humoring the kid, the cop says,
'Yeah, he sure did.'
The kid says, 'Well next year, tell Santa to put the dick underneath the horse instead of on top.'
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| Posted by pedro on 09-Aug-2005 | Parents AwayA traveling salesman knocks on the door of a house. A kid, about 12 years old, answers the door. He's wearing a pink tutu, has a cigar in one hand, and a martini in the other.
The salesman is a little taken back, so he asks,
'Excuse me, son, are your parents home?'
The kid takes a big puff on the cigar and answers, 'What the f*** do you think?'
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| Posted by Grace Littlehales on 09-Aug-2005 | Speed CameraA policeman had a perfect spot to watch for speeding motorists but wasn't getting many. Then he discovered the problem.
A 10-year-old boy was standing up the road with a hand-painted sign that read 'Radar Trap Ahead'. The officer then found a young accomplice down the road with a sign reading 'Tips' and a bucket full of change.
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