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If You Were my Husba

A woman at a party walked up to a man and told him, ''If you were my husband I would poison your drink."

The man replied, ''If you were my wife I would drink it.''

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	():bar jokes (2610): Taxi Fare

Posted by Louis Turner on 09-Aug-2005

Taxi Fare

A frat boy gets into the back of a cab, and asks the cabbie, "Do you have enough room up there for a Pizza and a six pack of Beer?"

The cabbie says, "Sure."

So the frat boy leans forward and throws-up.

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	():bar jokes (2610): Celtic Mortality

Posted by cooter on 09-Aug-2005

Celtic Mortality

What is the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral?

One less drunk!!!

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	():bar jokes (2610): Beer Goggles

Posted by Sexy Monster on 09-Aug-2005

Beer Goggles

Joe stopped at his favorite watering hole after a hard day's work to relax. He noticed a man next to him order a shot and a beer. The man drank the shot, chased it with the beer and then looked into his shirt pocket. This continued several times before Joe's curiosity got the best of him. He leaned over to the guy and said, “Excuse me, I couldn't help but notice your little ritual. Why in the world do you look into your shirt pocket every time you drink your shot and beer?” The man replied, “There's a picture of my wife in there, and when she starts lookin' good, I'm headin' home!”

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	():bar jokes (2610): Drunken Donut II: Th

Posted by Jerrette R. Frank on 09-Aug-2005

Drunken Donut II: Th

A cop pulls over a guy.
"Your eyes are awfully red. Have you been drinking?"

"Gee, officer," the man says.

"Your eyes are awfully glazed -- have you been eating doughnuts?"

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	():bar jokes (2610): Braggadocio

Posted by Max Willman on 09-Aug-2005

Braggadocio

Four guys are drinking in a bar, bragging about their sons.
"My son," the first one says, "started out washing cars at dealership, but now owns the dealership and just gave one of his friends four new cars of his choice!"
"My son," said the second, "started out serving lunch in a real estate office, but now owns the real estate office and just gave one of his friends a new mansion!"
"My son," said the third, "started out sweeping the floors at the Stock Exchange, but now practically owns the Stock Exchange and just gave one of his friends a $1,000,000 in stock."

"Well," the fourth guy said, "my son's turned out to be a bit of a disappointment. He's a gay hairdresser and he has SEVERAL boyfriends. On the plus side, between them, they gave him four cars, a mansion, and a million dollars in stock for his birthday."

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