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():crazy jokes (57): Iowa Suckz


Posted by Jocky on 08-Aug-2005

Iowa Suckz

Three guys are riding horses.

1 Minnesota man, 1 Iowa man, and 1 Texas man.

Along the way the guy from texas takes out a bottle of wine, takes 1 sip throws it in the air, draws his pistol and shoots it.

The Iowa horseman asked, "Whatchya doin' that fer, thaz good stuff!?!"

The Texan replies, "Well we got plenty of that where I come from."

Later on the Iowa horseman takes out a bottle of whiskey, takes 1 sip, throws it in the air, draws his pistol and shoots it.

And the Minnesotan asked, "Why the hell'd you do that?!?! That's reeeeaaaalll good stuff!"

And the Iowa guy replies, "Oh we got plenty of that where I come from."

So the Minnesotan takes out a can of beer, slams it, shoots the guy from Iowa, and the Texan asked, "Why in the name of the holy father did you do that!?!?!"

The minnesotan replied, "We got plenty of them where i come from!"

(This won't be as funny if you're not from the great state of Minnesota."
   

9 people have rated this joke:
3.56/10
     

():crazy jokes (57): You're so poor joke


Posted by Stalker on 08-Aug-2005

You're so poor joke

You're so poor you can't afford a boner.
   

6 people have rated this joke:
3.50/10
     

():crazy jokes (57): Oceans


Posted by Joe Mama on 08-Aug-2005

Oceans

What did the Pacific ocean so to the Atlantic ocean?

They didn't say anything... they just waved.


jokes
   

2 people have rated this joke:
3.50/10
     

():crazy jokes (57): Solutions For An Insane World


Posted by Jase A. Bryant on 11-Aug-2005

Solutions For An Insane World

Problem: World Hunger


Solution: Chop up some of the hungry people and feed them to other hungry people until no one is hungry anymore.


Problem: World Peace


Solution: Remove all the humans from the planet.


Problem: Poverty


Solution: Give the poor people the job of chopping up the hungry people and pay them.


Problem: People Leaching Welfare (CANADA)


Solution: Chop them up with the hungry people.


Problem: War


Solution: Create a new law so that for every person you kill, you loose a limb. Bullets and firearms will be sold to you, but at the price of a limb. When you die, your firearms will be cremated with you.


Problem: Injustice


Solution: This will never be solved, because no matter how fair something may be, some damn whiner will bitch about it and come up with some lame excuse as to why it is unfair.


Problem: Over Population


Solution: Sterilize the population.


Problem: Nuclear Weapons


Solution: Dismantle them and send them into space. If we ever need them to blow up an asteroid, then put them together again.


Problem: Aliens Stealing DNA Samples


Solution: Start shooting DNA into space to save the aliens the trip... and us the probing.


Problem: Washing Machine & Dryer Stealing Socks


Solution: Take them into the fields and shoot them along with the designers.


Problem: Stupid People


Solution: Kill them. Only I get to decide who lives.


Problem: Bad Parents


Solution: Parents must pass a test administered by me. If they fail, they get sterilized until they pass the test. If you fail twice, you stay sterilized for 5 years.


Problem: Animal Abuse


Solution: Kill the person doing it. I get to kill them.


Problem: Space Junk Floating AroundSolution: Make a giant pool skimmer and clean the place up! How can we possibly have company over when the place is a mess?


Problem: Stupid Teenage Female Puppet Singers (Like Brittany Spears)


Solution: Pump up their fake boobs until they explode or fuck them up the ass real hard until they bleed to death. Tape it as well so I can piss myself laughing.


Problem: Dumbass All Boy Bands Who All Sound The Same


Solution: Force them to do their little dance routines for months, or until they collapse. If that doesn't work, then fuck them up the ass real hard until they bleed to death. Then shoot them and tape it for me.
   

11 people have rated this joke:
2.64/10
     

():crazy jokes (57): Scabs


Posted by KaBoOm on 08-Aug-2005
Scabs
This guy is having sex with a hooker and he says, "You're so dry."

The hooker replies, "Give me two minutes."

Two minutes later she comes back and they continue. The man says, "That's much better. What did you do?"

The hooker replies, "I picked off the scabs."
   

8 people have rated this joke:
2.25/10
     

():crazy jokes (57): Mickey's divorce


Posted by Sandi J. Jeter on 08-Aug-2005
Mickey's divorce
Why did Mickey divorce Minnie?

Because Minnie was fucking goofy.

   

7 people have rated this joke:
2.00/10
     

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