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():funny thoughts (97): Is it true that cannibals


Posted by jarrod baimbridge on 09-Aug-2005

Is it true that cannibals

Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?

If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?

Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?

"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, and drycleaners depressed?
   

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():funny thoughts (97): Why is it so hard


Posted by polishpistol on 09-Aug-2005

Why is it so hard

Why is it so hard to remember how to spell MNEMONIC?

If someone invented instant water, what would they mix it with?

Why is it called a TV "set" when you only get one?

Why does your nose run and your feet smell?

Why does an alarm clock "go off" when it begins ringing?
   

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():funny thoughts (97): Why is there an expiration


Posted by Kenny Ross on 09-Aug-2005

Why is there an expiration

Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?

If most car accidents occur within five miles of home, why doesn't everyone just move 10 miles away?

If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?

I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section? She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.

If all those psychics know the winning lottery numbers, why are they all still working?
   

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():funny thoughts (97): If space is a vacuum,


Posted by AnGeL ChRiS on 09-Aug-2005

If space is a vacuum,

If space is a vacuum, who changes the bags?

If swimming is good for your shape, then why do the whales look the way they do?

If tin whistles are made out of tin, what do they make fog horns out of?

If white wine goes with fish, do white grapes go with sushi?

If you jog backwards, will you gain weight?
   

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():funny thoughts (97): If Fed Ex and UPS


Posted by Wedgey Boy on 09-Aug-2005
If Fed Ex and UPS
If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?

Why are there 5 syllables in the word "monosyllabic"?

Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?

Why do scientists call it research when looking for something new?

If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
   

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():funny thoughts (97): If athletes get athlete's foot,


Posted by Rey Jose on 09-Aug-2005
If athletes get athlete's foot,
If athletes get athlete's foot, do astronauts get mistletoe?

If Barbie's so popular, why do you have to buy all her friends?

If blind people wear dark glasses, why don't deaf people wear earmuffs?

Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
   

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