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():sport jokes (950): I've lost my dad


Posted by Rebecca L. O'Quinn on 10-Aug-2005

I've lost my dad

A small boy was crying his eyes out at a football match. Seeing his plight, a
policeman came up to him and asked what the problem was.
"I've lost my dad," cried the boy. "What's he like?" asked the policeman.
"Beer, fags and women," said the boy.
   

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():sport jokes (950): Couldn't play without me


Posted by Laurie Hiestand on 10-Aug-2005

Couldn't play without me

When I was a young boy, all the other kids insisted that I was in the football
team. They said I was vital to the game.
They couldn't possibly play without me.
They needed me.
I was the only one with a football.
   

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():sport jokes (950): Picked for the school team


Posted by pedro on 10-Aug-2005

Picked for the school team

"Dad, dad!" cried Philip, as he arrived home one evening. "I think I've been
selected for the school football team."
"That's good," said his father. "But why do you only think you've been
selected? Aren't you sure? What position are you playing?"
"Well," replied Philip, "it's not been announced officially, but I overheard
the football coach tell my teacher that if I was in the team I'd be a great
draw-back."
   

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():sport jokes (950): Play every other match


Posted by Vickie Felix on 10-Aug-2005

Play every other match

`I just don't understand it,' an Irish footballer complained.
`One match I play very well, and then the next match I'm terrible.'
'Well,' said his wife, `why don't you just play every other match?'
   

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():sport jokes (950): Just so long


Posted by Me myself and I on 10-Aug-2005
Just so long
`I don't care about results!' said an Irish team manager being interviewed on
television. 'Just so long as our team wins!'
   

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():sport jokes (950): Football Math!


Posted by Robert T. on 11-Aug-2005
Football Math!
A football coach walked into the locker room before a big game, looked over to his star player and said, "I'm not supposed to let you play since you failed math, but we really need you in there. So, what I have to do is ask you a math question, and if you get it right, you can play."

The player agreed, so the coach looked into his eyes intently and asked, - "Okay, now concentrate hard and tell me the answer to this: What is two plus two?"

The player thought for a moment and then answered, "4?"
"Did you say 4?!" the coach exclaimed, excited that he had given the right answer.

Suddenly, all the other players on the team began screaming, "Come on coach, give him another chance!"
   

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