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| Posted by Krista N. Andrson on 13-Aug-2005 | Legal ParrotA man goes into a pet shop to buy a parrot. The shop owner points to three identical-looking parrots on a perch and says, "The parrot on the left costs $500."
"Why does the parrot cost so much?" asks the customer.
The owner says "Well, the parrot knows how to do legal research." The customer then asks about the next parrot, to be told that this one costs $1,000 because it can do everything the other parrot can do plus it knows how to write a brief that will win any case.
Naturally, the increasingly startled customer asks about the third parrot, to be told that it costs $4,000. Needless to say, this begs the question, "What can it do?"
To which the owner replies, "To be honest, I've never seen him do a darn thing, but the other two call him Senior Partner."
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| Posted by Box Social on 14-Aug-2005 | chet the birdOne day a man went to a pet store to buy his wife a christmas
present. "Can i help you?" said the pet salesman. "yes I'm
looking for a bird for my wife for Christmas. She love birds."
"I suggest this one sir, his name is chet when you stick a
lighter to his right foot he sings." so the man stuck a lighter
under chets right foot. He started to sing "Jingle bells jingle
bells, jingle all the way..." When you stick a lighter under his
left for he sings a different song. So the man stuck a lighter
under chets left foot and he sang "Deck the hall with bows of
holly..." Wow said the man I'll take him. Christmas came around
and the man gave chet to his wife. She listened to him sing
jingle bells and deck the halls. "Hun, I love him," she said.
"But what happens when you put the lghter between both feet?" "I
dont know lets find out." So they stuck the lighter between both
of his feet and he sang "Chets nuts roasting on an open fire..."
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| Posted by Wasabi angel on 10-Aug-2005 | Elephant PhysiologyWhy do elephants have four feet?
Because six inches isn't enough!
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| Posted by Emily M on 13-Aug-2005 | Shag your sheepA researcher is conducting a survey into sheep shagging. First of all he visits a Cornish farmer. ''So, Cornish farmer, how do you shag your sheep?''
''Well, I take the hind legs of the sheep and put them down my wellie boot and take the front legs of the sheep and put them over a wall.''
''That's very interesting,'' replies the researcher and he leaves the Cornish farmer. Then he meets a Midlands Farmer. ''So, Midlands farmer, how do you shag your sheep?''
''Well, I take the hind legs of the sheep and put them down my wellie boots and take the front legs of the sheep and put them over a wall.''
''That's very interesting,'' replies the researcher. ''That's how they do it in Cornwall too.'' And he leaves the Midlands farmer. Then he meets a farmer from Abergaveny. ''So, Abergaveny farmer, how do you shag your sheep?''
''Well, I take the hind legs of the sheep and put them down my wellie boots and take the front legs of the sheep and put them over my shoulders.''
''Over your shoulders?'' replies the researcher. ''Don't you put them over a wall like everyone else?''
''What?'' says the farmer. ''And miss out on all the kissing?!''
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| Posted by Dezaray Phillips on 13-Aug-2005 | Hippo loveQ: Why do hippoes only mate under water.
A: Have you ever tried keeping a 5 houndred pond pussy wet.
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| Posted by Gothic Bitch on 14-Aug-2005 | the english cat and the french catthere was an english cat called one two three and there was a
french cat called un don twa
any way they decided to hav a race across the english channel
the one two three cat made it but the un don twa cat sank
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