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| Posted by Something on 10-Aug-2005 | Mad CondomWhy did the condom fly across the room?
An It got pissed off!!!
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| Posted by house b. big on 10-Aug-2005 | A Beard?A married man was visiting his "girlfriend" when she requested that he shave
his beard. "Oh James, I like your beard, but I would really love to see your
handsome face."
James replied, "My wife loves this beard, I couldn't possibly do it, she would
kill me!!"
"Oh please?" the girlfriend asked again, in a sexy little voice...
"Oh really, I can't," he replies..."My wife loves this beard!!"
The girlfriend asked once more, and he sighs and finally gives in. That night
James crawls into bed with his wife while she was sleeping.
The wife is awakened somewhat, feels his face and replies, "Oh Michael, you
shouldn't be here, my husband will be home soon!"
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4 people have rated this joke: |
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| Posted by Ben C. Bays on 10-Aug-2005 | What do you call a blind deer?Q: What do you call a blind deer?
A: "No-eye deer".
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| Posted by XX2Gurly4UXX on 12-Aug-2005 | Spongebob jokewhy do you think Mr.Crabs let spongebob do all the cookin?
Because he would come in handy for cleanin after all these years of hard work!
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| Posted by William C. Herbert on 14-Aug-2005 | Things I Learned from ChildrenIf you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough
to rotate a 42-pound boy wearing pound puppy underwear and a superman
cape.
It is strong enough, however, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 by
20-foot room.
When you hear the toilet flush and the words "Uh-oh," it's already too
late.
Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
A six-year-old can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36 year
old man says they can only do it in the movies.
If you use a waterbed as home plate while wearing baseball shoes it does
not leak--it explodes.
A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. foot house 4
inches deep.
Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a four-year-old.
Super glue is forever.
McGyver can teach us many things we don't want to know.
No matter how much Jello you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk
on water.
Pool filters do not like Jello.
VCR's do not eject PB&J sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.
Always look in the oven before you turn it on.
The fire department in San Jose has at least a 5-minute response time.
The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.
It will, however, make cats dizzy.
Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
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| Posted by Jeff D. Ahern on 08-Aug-2005 | Knock knock jokeKnock knock!
Who's there?
I dont know. Go answer the door.
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