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| Posted by allie on 10-Aug-2005 | One More TimeThree gay men died, and were going to be cremated. Their lovers (Rascal,
Dumbass ,Bobby) happened to be at the funeral home at the same time, and were
discussing what they planned to do with the ashes. The first man (Rascal) said,
'My Benny loved to fly, so I'm going up in a plane and scatter his ashes in the
sky.' The second man (Dumbass) said, 'My Carl was a good fisherman, so I'm going
to scatter his ashes in our favorite lake.' The third man (Bobby) said, 'My Jim
was such a good lover, I think I'm going to dump his ashes in a pot of chili, so
he can tear my ass up just one more time.'
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| Posted by Farzad F. Rad on 10-Aug-2005 | Stuff ItHe laid her on the table
so white clean and bare.
His forehead wet with beads of sweat
He rubbed her here and there.
He touched her neck and then her breast
and then drooling felt her thigh.
The slit was wet and all was set,
He gave a joyous cry.
The hole was wide... he looked inside
All was dark and murky.
He rubbed his hands and stretched his arms...
And then he stuffed the turkey.
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| Posted by super p. man on 10-Aug-2005 | THINGS go better with CokeAn airplane full of a shipment of Pepsi flying over Africa had a malfunction,
and went down. A few weeks later, the Pepsi Company sent a rescue plane. They
searched the area and found a tribe of cannibals.
They walked up to the Chief of the tribe and asked him if he knew anything
about the crash.
The Chief said, "You betcha!"
When asked where the crew was, the Chief replied, "We ate the crew, and we
drank the Pepsi."
The Rescue crew was shocked. One man asked, "Did you eat their legs?"
The chief replied, "We ate their legs, and we drank the Pepsi."
Another rescuer asked, "Did you eat their arms?"
The Chief replied, "We ate their arms, and we drank the Pepsi."
After looking totally perplexed for a minute, a third asked, "Did you...you
know...eat, their...'things'?"
The chief says, "No."
"No?" asked the rescuer.
"No," replied the Chief, "THINGS go better with Coke."
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| Posted by Freak in snow on 10-Aug-2005 | English, Irishman, Scotsman jokeThere was an Englishman Irishman and a Scotsman who worked on a building site.
It was time for their dinner so the Englishman opened his bait box and said
"if I get cheese sandwiches tomorrow I will throw myself off that bridge" the
Scotsman and Irishman say the same
so the next day comes and the Englishman has cheese sandwiches so he jumps off
the bridge
the Scotsman looks and he also has cheese sandwiches so he jumps off the
bridge and the Irishman looks and he also has cheese sandwiches so he jumps off
the bridge
at the funeral the wives meet up and the Englishman??™s wife says "I could of
just made him another kind of sandwich" the Scotsman??™s wife says I would of got
another kind of cheese" the Irishman??™s wife says I do not know why he jumped he
made his own sandwiches.
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| Posted by Riababe on 10-Aug-2005 | The Three FoodsThere were three kids that needed a place to stay for the night. They saw a
house and knocked..... A farmer answered the door and the kids asked if they
could stay the night. The farmer said yes and told them to sleep in the barn but
no matter what DON'T eat his wife's fresh baked pie. So the kids went to sleep.
It was 5:00am when they woke up and they were so hungry that they ate the pie.
On the next day the farmer was going to punish them and he told them to go pick
one fruit each. So thy did. The first kid came back with an orange and the
farmer out it up his nose! The second kid came back with a cherry and the farmer
put it up his nose! Both kids started laughing and laughing. The farmer said why
is you laughing this were supposed to hurt. They said we saw the third kid
picking a watermelon.
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| Posted by jessica r. church on 10-Aug-2005 | Business tripA man goes to Japan for a business trip. The President of the business is
Japanese and insists it is only right for the man to sleep with his wife. The
man says no I'm married. The boss insists though that he sleeps with his wife.
So the man says," ok just tonight." Well all night the boss??™s wife is saying
Muchaka, Muchaka. The next day the man and his boss are golfing. When they got
to the eighteenth hole everything was going good and the boss was about to give
the man a raise. The man got out his wood and took a shot. He got a hole and
one. After the ball went in the boss??™s wife said Muchaka. The man said to his
boss," your wife said Muchaka all last night and said it again just know. What
does it mean?" the boss replied.??? it means wrong hole."
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