|
|
 |
|
 |
 |
| Posted by Amanda S. Fletcher on 09-Aug-2005 | Sailors HatA small boy walked into a men's room.
He saw a sailor in full dress uniform.
The little boy got really excited, and asked the sailor, "Are you a REAL Sailor???"
The sailor replied, "Why, yes, son, I am. Would you like to wear my hat?"
The little boy said, "Yes!!" and put on the hat.
A Marine entered the bathroom. The little boy, very excitedly asked, "Mister, Mister, are you a REAL Marine???"
The Marine answered, "Yes, son, I am! Why, do you wanta suck my dick?"
The little boy exclaimed, "I'm not a real Sailor! I'm just wearing the hat!!!"
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
| Posted by funny jokes on 09-Aug-2005 | Restaurant VisitThe maitre d' of a fashionable restaurant looked up and saw three little girls standing in the waiting area. They were dressed in their mother's clothes, had on high-heeled shoes and were wearing lots of make-up.
The lunch crowd hadn't started to arrive yet so he decided to treat them like regular guests just to see what they were up to. He seated them at a table and asked what they would like to order.
The first little girl ordered a martini, the second one asked for a margarita and the third one said, "I'd like to have a douche...my mother says they're very refreshing."
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by hiyayaywhopee on 09-Aug-2005 | Bitter EndLittle Johnny's teacher asked him, "Johnny, give me a sentence using the words, "bitter end" in it.
Little Johnny thought for a moment and replies, "Our dog chased our cat and he bitter end."
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by Messerschmitt on 09-Aug-2005 | Worm EatingLittle Johnny sat playing in the garden.
When his mother came out to collect him, she saw that he was slowly eating a worm.
She turned pale. "No, Johnny! Stop! That's horrible! You can't eat worms!"
Trying to convince him further, "Now the mother worm is looking all over for her nice baby-worm."
"No, she isn't," said Johnny.
"Why not?"
"Because I ate her first!"
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by cool sal on 09-Aug-2005 | Your UglyLittle Johnny said to his aunt Tess, "My God, you're ugly, aren't you!"
His mother overheard this and pulled Johnny into the kitchen.
"You naughty boy!" she screamed, "How can you say to your aunt that she's ugly! You go right in and apologize to her! Tell her you're sorry!"
Little Johnny entered the living room, walked over to his aunt and said, "Aunt Tess, I am sorry you're so ugly."
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by sheila Murray on 09-Aug-2005 | BeautifulThe teacher says, "Children, today I will ask each of you to come to the front of the class and use a word in a sentence. Today's word is "beautiful".
Little Sally, would you please come up here and use "beautiful" in a sentence?"
Little Sally walked to the front of the room, thought for a moment and said, "Teacher, my mom is the most beautiful woman in the world."
Teacher says, "Very good, Little Sally, you may sit. Little Frankie, your turn."
Little Frankie walked to the front of the room, thought for a moment and said, "Teacher, the sunrise this morning was the most beautiful sunrise I have ever seen."
Teacher says, "Very good, Little Frankie, you may sit. Little Johnny, it's your turn."
Little Johnnie walked to the front of the room, thought for a moment and said, "Teacher, last night my big sister told my dad that she was pregnant and he said, "Beautiful, just fucking beautiful."
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
