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| Posted by Cookie Monster on 12-Aug-2005 | The Hillbilly and the IndiansA hillbilly and two Indians were walking along. Around them were lots of caves. Suddenly one of the Indians ran up to one of the caves and yelled,
WOOOOOOWOOOOOOWOOOOOOWOOOOOWOOOOOOO!
There was a reply from inside the cave, WOOOOOOOOWOOOOOWOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOWOOOOO! So the Indian tore off his clothes and ran inside.
The hillbilly was confused about this, so he asked the other Indian, who replied, Well during mating season, all the women hide inside these caves, and what the men have to do is go up to one of the caves and yell WOOOOWOOOOWOOOOWOOOOOWOOOO! And if the women yell WOOOOWOOOOWOOOOWOOOOWOOOO! he can then take off his clothes and go in to mate.
And indeed, when they came to another cave, the Indian ran up to it and yelled WOOOOOOOWOOOOOOWOOOOOOWOOOOOOWOOOOOOO! There was another WOOOOOOWOOOOOWOOOOOWOOOOOOWOOOOOOO! from inside the cave, so the Indian tore off his clothes and ran inside to mate with the women in the cave.
The hillbilly thought this was a great idea. He ran up to one really big cave, thinking, Wow, there must be lots of big beautiful women in here! So he called, WOOOOOOWOOOOOWOOOOOOWOOOOOWOOOOO!, and sure enough he heard a loud WOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOWOOOOOOO! The hillbilly tore off his clothes and dashed inside.
The next day, the front page of the local newspaper bore the headline:
NAKED HILLBILLY RUN OVER BY FREIGHT TRAIN
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| Posted by Dan K on 12-Aug-2005 | Long lifeA man once told his son that if he wanted to live a long life, the secret was to sprinkle a little gunpowder on his cornflakes every morning. The son did this religiously, and lived to be 93.
When he died, he left 14 children, 28 grandchildren, 35 great-grandchildren, and a 15-foot hole in the wall of the crematorium.
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| Posted by Fredrick Flinstone on 12-Aug-2005 | 3 toiletsThere are three men going to buy toilets,
one buys a steal toilet, and comes back after a week saying its too cold.
the second one buys a cotton toilet, comes back after two weeks saying its too soft!
the third one buys a musical toilet, cames back after a month saying \" EVERY TIME I SIT ON IT, IT SINGS THE NATIONAL ANTHEM, SO I HAVE TO STNDUP!\"
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| Posted by HOLY SH**!!! on 12-Aug-2005 | 7 ElevenQ:What time is it in India?
A:Seven Eleven on the Dot
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| Posted by Cara A. Wegimont on 12-Aug-2005 | MuffinlessPeople eat muffins for breakfast, and for snacks. But not Harold. Harold was muffinless. He loved the tasty goodness of the top part and the more tasty goodness of the bottom part but still, he was muffinless. One day, Harold became ill and his doctor told him to stay in bed. On that day, it rained muffins. One day a neighbor came up to Harold and told him to have a muffin, but whether it was good, bad, poisoned, or delicious, we will never know, for that is the end of our story.
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| Posted by Jenna M. Glickman on 12-Aug-2005 | The treeThere once was a girl who loved goin up over the hills of her grandma\'s house. One day she was exploring and found a tree. This was no ordinary tree. It was a muffin tree. She loved muffins. She always came up to that tree and ate its muffins. But one day, she got tired. \"Why do you only grow blueberry muffins, muffin tree. Please make another muffin,\" she said. Now we all know that trees don\'t talk but that doesn\'t mean that they don\'t listen. The next day, there was a green, radioactive muffin on the tree. The girl tasted it. It was the best muffin she had ever had. But in three minutes, she fell over, dead.
The moral of the story is this... Never talk to muffin trees.
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