jokes and quotes

jokes and quotes
http://www.jokesnquotes.com/ - jokes and quotes
  Categories

funny quotes

animal jokes

bar jokes

holiday jokes

travel & vacation jokes

sport jokes

other funny jokes

signs of our times

nerd jokes

just do it

funny laws

funny definitions

blind jokes

funny bumper stickers

crazy jokes

food jokes

funny ads

little johnny

school humor

top list jokes

funny thoughts



Navigation:

· jokes and quotes
· Add joke
· New jokes
· Last 5 jokes
· Best jokes
· Search jokes
  Service menu

· Freedback
· Recommend Us
· Subscription

  Our friends

There isn't content right now for this block.

():nerd jokes (650): The reason computer chips are so small is...


Posted by Derek K. Lewis on 07-Aug-2005

The reason computer chips are so small is...

The reason computer chips are so small is computers don't eat much.
   

2 people have rated this joke:
4.50/10
     

():nerd jokes (650): New bartender


Posted by Dippy on 13-Aug-2005

New bartender

A guy walks into a bar, and there's a horse behind the bar serving drinks. The guy is staring at the horse, when the horse says, "Hey buddy? What are you staring at? Haven't you ever seen a horse serving drinks before?"

The guy says, "No, it's not that... it's just that I never thought the parrot would sell the place."


   

9 people have rated this joke:
4.11/10
     

():nerd jokes (650): Speaking of being stuck on one address, my...


Posted by BILLY B. PLOTTER on 07-Aug-2005

Speaking of being stuck on one address, my...

Speaking of being stuck on one address, my professor once told this tale of misoptimization, quite possibly apocryphal. It seems these computer architects were looking to speed up their machine. They looked at their dynamic instruction counts and picked a branch instruction that was heavily used. After fixing the microcode they started up the system again and noticed NO improvement in speed. Turns out the branch was used by the idle loop in the scheduler. All they did was make the CPU spin its wheels faster.
   

1 people have rated this joke:
4.00/10
     

():nerd jokes (650): You should go home....


Posted by Jordan L. Lee on 07-Aug-2005

You should go home....

You should go home.
   

1 people have rated this joke:
4.00/10
     

():nerd jokes (650): T-Shirt of the future #385:...


Posted by Fred Johnson on 07-Aug-2005
T-Shirt of the future #385:...
T-Shirt of the future #385:

"Mom and Dad went to Alpha Centauri and all I
got was this lousy T-shirt"

   

1 people have rated this joke:
3.00/10
     

():nerd jokes (650): What If Dr. Seuss Did Technical Writing?...


Posted by Dan Stepansky on 07-Aug-2005
What If Dr. Seuss Did Technical Writing?...

What If Dr. Seuss Did Technical Writing?

Here's an easy game to play.
Here's an easy thing to say:

If a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port,
And the bus is interrupted as a very last resort,
And the address of the memory makes your floppy disk abort,
Then the socket packet pocket has an error to report!

If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash,
And the double-clicking icon puts your window in the trash,
And your data is corrupted 'cause the index doesn't hash,
Then your situation's hopeless, and your system's gonna crash!

You can't say this?
What a shame sir!
We'll find you
Another game sir.

If the label on the cable on the table at your house,
Says the network is connected to the button on your mouse,
But your packets want to tunnel on another protocol,
That's repeatedly rejected by the printer down the hall,

And your screen is all distorted by the side effects of gauss
So your icons in the window are as wavy as a souse,
Then you may as well reboot and go out with a bang,
'Cause as sure as I'm a poet, the sucker's gonna hang!

When the copy of your floppy's getting sloppy on the disk,
And the microcode instructions cause unnecessary risc,
Then you have to flash your memory and you'll want to RAM your ROM.
Quickly turn off the computer and be sure to tell your mom!

   

1 people have rated this joke:
2.00/10
     

Jokes search
Input keyword:



Adversting