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| Posted by Snah Nesenra on 11-Aug-2005 | Top causes of Oakwood Fire AlarmsTop Causes of Oakwood Fire Alarms
1. Aeresol spray cans.
2. Fog machines.
3. Southsiders burning popcorn in the old microwave.
4. System glitch.
5. Southsiders burning popcorn in the old microwave...again.
6. See number 5.
7. System glitch...again.
8. Southsiders burning popcorn in the new microwave.
9. It's our good old friend, system glitch.
10. yet to be determined.
In short, between the southsiders and the fact that our alarm system is a piece of slag, we have had only 1 planned drill.
P.S. All of the above like to occur at 2:00 a.m. or later.
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| Posted by Alison Barnes on 11-Aug-2005 | College MajorsSuppose you have a professor hold up two apples and asks a class "How many objects am I holding?" you would probably get different responses from different majors like....
Business: Two Juicy, delious apples that are on sale at my store.
Chemistry: 6x10^30 apple molecules
History: You are holding dinosaur poop
Music: You are holding two objects that if you drop them you will get a D4
Education: Two Apples
Accounting: You are holding one apple because the other one has to go to the government as tax
Psycology: What objects?
Math: You are holding two sets of objects, that take up a finite amount of space called apples.
English: You are holding two lush pieces of fruit, that are nourishing and remind me of my dog Fido. Fido thy sweet fruit. So nourshing in my time of need, you fill me up with......
Art: Two apples (Ha, Ha...Thank goodness for photoshop. The perfect oportunity to take a picture of the professor and alter the picture so that I have a blackmail photo).
Computer Science: Two apples (I'll take the art major's picture and post it on my website for all to see, and add links so that people could find similar pictures(and I make $)).
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| Posted by Gary Jensen on 11-Aug-2005 | UNC Chapel HellQ: How many UNC-Chapel Hill students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: One - he just holds the bulb and lets the world revolve around him.
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| Posted by Aimee C. Goldberg on 12-Aug-2005 | The PromotionBoss: Johnson, we giving you a promotion but you have to move to Montreal. Johnson: Montreal! "Nothing comes from there except hookers and hockey players!"
Boss: Listen pal, my wife comes from there!
Johnson: Without missing a beat replies, "No kidding! What position does she play?"
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| Posted by ~Stephy~ on 12-Aug-2005 | Your armpits are so hairyYour armpits are so hairy, the teacher gave you an A for not raising your hand!
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| Posted by Air Force X on 13-Aug-2005 | You So StupidYou so stupid yo Teacher told you to turn to page 14 in yo book and you said what page 14 on.
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