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| Posted by geoff bauer on 14-Aug-2005 | Top Four Wacky Warning Lables1. On a set of shin pads: pads do not protect areas they don't
cover. (Obviously)
2. On a public toilet: Recycled flush water is unsafe to drink.
(Now, that's just nasty)
3. On an electrical router: this product not intended for a
dental drill. (I think my dentist has one of those)
4. On a novelty rock set called popcorn rock: eating rocks may
cause loss of or chipped teeth. (This one is self explanatory)
[IDIOTS]
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| Posted by Me on 14-Aug-2005 | Genuine letters sent to LandlordsThe following are genuine letters sent to landlords...
1. The toilet is blocked and we cannot bathe the children until
it is cleared.
2. This is to let you know that there is a smell coming from the
man next door.
3. I want some repairs done to my stove as it has backfired and
burnt my knob off.
4. The toilet seat is cracked: where do i stand
5. I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is running away from
the wall.
6. Our kitchen floor is very damp, we have two children and
would like a third, so will you please send someone to do
something about it.
7. I request your permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen.
8. Our lavatory seat is broken in half and is now in three
pieces.
9. The person next door has a large erection in his back garden,
which is unsightly and dangerous.
10. Will you please send someone to mend our cracked sidewalk.
Yesterday my wife tripped on it and is now pregnant.
11. Will you please send someone to look at my water, it is a
funny colour and not fit to drink.
12. When the workmen were here they put their tools in my wife's
new drawers and made a mess. Please send men with clean tools to
finish the job and keep my wife happy.
13. Will you please send someone to mend my downspout. i am an
old age pensioner and need it straight away.
14. Could you please send someone to fix our bath tap. My wife
got her toe stuck in it and its very uncomfortable for us.
15. I want to complain about the farmer across the road. Every
morning at 5:30 his cock wakes me up, and it is getting too much.
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| Posted by churchboybrian on 14-Aug-2005 | Have in CommonWhat do lawyers, McDonalds hamburgers, election promises, and a
Johnny-on-the-Spot have in common?
They're all loaded with shit.
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| Posted by The Rat on 07-Aug-2005 | The first 90% of the job takes 90% of the...The first 90% of the job takes 90% of the time.
The last 10% takes the other 90%.
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| Posted by K9mom on 07-Aug-2005 | You know you have problems when the barber...You know you have problems when the barber has a USMC tattoo on his arm.
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