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| Posted by Princess foxy on 14-Aug-2005 | Trip to Newfoundland HALIFAX TO GANDER
12 DAYS - 4 NIGHTS
JAN. 21 - FEB. 30
Itinerary
1st Day: Leave Halifax International Airport 4:35am. All passengers
travel first class aboard Air Newf's Uni-Engine Jumbo Jet.
2nd day: In Air
3rd day: In Air
4th day: In Air
5th day: Arrive Gander 9:00pm and on to Gander Curling Club, 3rd floor,
basement annex for box dinner of clam chowder and soda crackers.
6th day: After breakfast, complete city tour of gander, 9:30am-9:30am.
Free time for shop lifting followed by a fabulous 9-course meal
consisting of: Rabbit Soup, One Seal Flipper Pie, Cod Bits and a
Six-pack.
7th day: Tour of countryside in the comfort of a U.S. war surplus Jeep
left behind after the historical American evacuation.
8th day: Back to town for a tour of the new Civic Library. Everyone will
get to see the book.
9th day: Board waiting Jumbo Jet to the Mainland. Only three quick stops
(two for fuel and one for directions.)
10th day: In Air
11th day: In Air
12th day: Arrive Halifax between 10:00am and Midnight, depending on
weather conditions and fuel supply.
ONLY $49.50 per couple.
* Includes transportation, meals, drugs, tours, transfers, hotel, first
aid and parachute (opens on impact) *
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| Posted by Jerrette R. Frank on 14-Aug-2005 | Picking your ass?This is a true story that actually happened to me.
I was on a field trip to New York City with my friend Emmanuel. We were on
one of those nicer buses with the bucket seats. During the ride we would
complain to each other if one of us were over in the other's territory,
you know, over the crack between the seats. On the way home at night my
friend was lying against the window trying to get some sleep. I saw him
reach over near his ass and I said, "What are you doing, picking your
ass?" And he says, "No, I'm just feeling the crack."
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| Posted by XX2Gurly4UXX on 14-Aug-2005 | VacationSanta Clause, The Easter Bunny, and a Lepercon all go on a
vacation. They are all drivin in the car when they all have to
go to the bathroom so they pull over at this hotel. They all go
inside and the Lepercon asked the secritary when the bathroom
is.
The Secretary says it's down the hall and to the left, but it's
haunted.But the Lepercon really has to go so he does anyway. So
he go's into the bathroom. Then all of a sudden a ghost pops out
of nowhere and says I'm the ghost say's "I'm the ghost of
Lamborgini I'll cut off your balls and eat your weiny."The
Lepercon just ran out of the bathroom and ran away as quick as
he could. Then The Easter Bunny wasn't goin to go in but he
really had to so he did. Then when he got in there the ghost
said "I'm the ghost of Lamborgini I'll cut off your ball and eat
your weiny." And then the Easter Bunny runs off. So then Santa
say's "I really have to go to the bathroom." so he goes in and
then the ghost says again "I'm the ghost of Lamborgini I'll cut
off your balls and eat your weiny." Santa replies, "I'm the
ghost of Christmas Past you touch my ball I kick your ass."
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| Posted by assyrian king on 14-Aug-2005 | Friendly HawaiiWhy are Hawaiians considered to be so friendly?
They can hardly wait until you get off the plane to give you a lei.
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| Posted by Adam Schell on 14-Aug-2005 | Big CigarOne day there was a newly wed couple driving down the highway. Two truck
drivers were also driving down that same highway. The passenger in the
truck said "I have to take a shit!" "We're not stopping!" said the driver.
"Stick your ass out the window and shit." So the man did, but the driver
rolled the window up and squeezed his butt-cheeks together! Then the
newlywed couple drove by and the woman said, "honey, look at the big cigar
that guy's smoking!"
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| Posted by Bruce Henry on 14-Aug-2005 | Three men and a group of canibalsThere was a French man, a German man and an American man. They
were all travelling together on a far off island looking for
treasure. They soon ran into a group of canibals who wished to
eat them. The leader spoke up and said:
"Here, you may kill yourselves with a weapon of your choice,
then we shall eat you and save your skins to make our canoes."
The French man said "Here's to all the wine in Bordeaux, from my
wonderful country," then he shot himself in the head.
The German man said "Here's to all the beautiful women in my
beloved country," then he stabed himself through the heart.
The American said "Here's so that you can't make me into a
canoe," then he stabbed himself several times all over his body
with a fork.
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