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():nerd jokes (650): Two engineering students were walking across... |
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():nerd jokes (650): The Top 11 Things Uttered by Yoda While Making... |
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| Posted by Nickie M. Necsefr on 07-Aug-2005 | The Top 11 Things Uttered by Yoda While Making...The Top 11 Things Uttered by Yoda While Making Love
11. "Ahhh! Yoda's little friend you seek!"
10. "Urm. Put a shield on my saber I must."
9. "Feel the force!"
8. "Foreplay, cuddling - a Jedi craves not these things."
7. "Down here, I am. Find a ladder, I must!"
6. "Do me or do me not-there is no try."
5. "Early must I rise. Leave now you must!"
4. "Happens to every guy sometimes this does."
3. "When 900 years old you get, Viagra you need too, hmmmmm?"
2. "Ow, ow, OW! On my ear you are!"
1. "Who's your Jedi master? Who's your Jedi Master?"
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| Posted by Shania on 13-Aug-2005 | Black peopleWhy dont Black people dream????
because the last one that did got shot
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| Posted by Bradley H. Stanley on 12-Aug-2005 | The Inventor...This man goes along to the Patent Office with some of his new designs.
He says to the clerk, "I'd like to register my new invention. It's a folding bottle."
"OK," says the clerk. "What do you call it?"
"A fottle, replies the inventor."
"A fottle? That's a stupid! Can't you think of something else?"
"I can think about it. I've got something else though. It's a folding carton."
"And what do you call that?" asks the clerk.
"A farton", replies the inventor.
"That's rude. You can't possibly call it that!"
"In that case," says the inventor...
"You're really going to hate the name of my folding bucket."
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():nerd jokes (650): It may very well bring about immortality,... |
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| Posted by ~SwEeT*HeArT~ on 07-Aug-2005 | It may very well bring about immortality,...It may very well bring about immortality,
but it will take forever to test it.
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| Posted by Kitty Devil on 13-Aug-2005 | Ear thisThere was this man who was in a horrible accident, and was injured. But the only permanent damage he suffered was the amputation of both of his ears. As a result of this 'unusual' handicap, he was very self-conscious about his having no ears. Because of the accident, he received a large sum of money from the insurance company. It was always his dream to own his own business, so he decided with all this money he had, he now had the means to own a business.
So he went out and purchased a small, but expanding computer firm. But, he realized that he had no business knowledge at all, so he decided that he would have to hire someone to run the business. He picked out three top candidates, and interviewed each of them.
The first interview went really well. He really liked this guy. His last question for this first candidate was 'Do you notice anything unusual about me?' The guy said, 'Now that you mention it, you have no ears.' The man got really upset and threw the guy out.
The second interview went even better than the first. This candidate was much better than the first. Again, to conclude the interview, the man asked the same question again, 'Do you notice anything unusual about me?' This guy also noticed, 'Yes, you have no ears.' The man was really upset again, and threw this second candidate out.
Then he had the third interview. The third candidate was even better than the second, the best out of all of them. Almost certain that he wanted to hire this guy, the man once again asked, 'Do you notice anything unusual about me?'
The guy replied 'Yeah, you're wearing contact lenses.' Surprised, the man then asked, 'Wow! That's quite perceptive of you! How could you tell?'
The guy burst out laughing and said, 'Well, You can't wear glasses if you don't have any fucking ears!'
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