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():nerd jokes (650): Wildlife Tagging


Posted by Shawn T. Pillow on 13-Aug-2005

Wildlife Tagging

Bird Tags According to the Knight-Ridder News Service, the inscription on the metal bands used by the U.S. Department of the Interior to tag migratory birds has been changed. The bands used to bear the address of the Washington Biological Survey, abbreviated: Wash. Biol. Surv. until the agency received the following letter from an Arkansas camper:

"Dear Sirs: While camping last week I shot one of your birds. I think it was a crow. I followed the cooking instructions on the leg tag and I want to tell you, it was horrible." The bands are now marked Fish and Wildlife Service.


   

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():nerd jokes (650): The preacher and the lawnmower


Posted by cuttaholic on 13-Aug-2005

The preacher and the lawnmower

A preacher was making his rounds to his parishioners on a bicycle, when he came upon a little boy trying to sell a lawn mower. ''How much do you want for the mower?'' asked the preacher. ''I just want enough money to go out and buy me a bicycle'', said the little boy.

After a moment of consideration, the preacher asked, ''Will you take my bike in trade for it?'' The little boy asked if he could try it out first, and after riding the bike around a little while said, ''Mister, you've got yourself a deal.'' The preacher took the mower and began to try to crank it. He pulled on the string a few times with no response from the mower. The preacher called the little boy over and said, ''I can't get this mower to start.''

The little boy said, ''That's because you have to cuss at it to get it started.''

The preacher said, ''I am a minister, and I cannot cuss. It has been so long since I have been saved that I do not even remember how to cuss.''

The little boy looked at him happily and said, ''Just keep pulling on that string. It'll come back to ya!''


   

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():nerd jokes (650): The Department of Motor Vehicles


Posted by ryanjenkins on 13-Aug-2005

The Department of Motor Vehicles

After spending 3-1/2 hours enduring the long lines, surly clerks, and insane regulations, at the department of motor vehicles, I stopped at a toy store to pick up a gift for my son.

I brought my selection - a baseball bat - to the cash register. 'Cash or charge?' the clerk asked.

'Cash,' I snapped. Then realizing that my pent-up frustrations had just leaked out, I apologized for my rudeness, and explained: 'I've spent the afternoon at the Department of Motor Vehicles.'

'Shall I giftwrap the bat?' the clerk asked sweetly. 'Or are you going back there?'


   

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():nerd jokes (650): Ya mama


Posted by Lady Love on 13-Aug-2005

Ya mama

ya mamas so fat when she went bunnge jummping she went strait to hell
   

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():nerd jokes (650): Jimmy Crack corn


Posted by Melissa R. Delaat on 13-Aug-2005
Jimmy Crack corn
Why did they make a song about jimmy cracks corn if they dont care it goes jimmy crack corn and i dont care jimmy crack corn and i dont care!!!!!
   

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():nerd jokes (650): Captain hook


Posted by Garbett on 13-Aug-2005
Captain hook
Q: Why did Captain Hook die? A: Because he wiped his ass.
   

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