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| Posted by Alli M. Kranz on 14-Aug-2005 | Wit and Wisdom Of Homer SipmsonThese are some of Homer Simpson's quote from Season 1 & 2
Season 1
It says it's for dogs, but she can't read.
I bet Einstein turned himself all sorts of colors before he invented the
light bulb.
Unlike most of you, I am not a but.
When will I learn? The answers to life's problems aren't at the bottom of
a bottle. They're on TV!
As far as anyone knows, we're a nice normal family.
And remember not to act afraid. Animals can smell fear. And they don't
like it.
I can understand how they wouldn't let in those wild jungle apes, but what
about those really smart ones who live among us who roller-skate and smoke
cigars?
I couldn't very well chop your hand off and bring it to the store could I?
Season 2
It's a fixer-upper. What's the problem? We get a bunch of priests in
here...
Marge, this ticket doesn't just give me a seat. It also gives me the
right-no the duty-to make a complete ass of myself.
Oh, cruel fate. Why do you mock me?
You heard me. I won't be in for the rest of the week. I told you. My
baby beat me up. Oh, it is not the worst excuse I ever thought up.
And anyone can be tooted?
English! Who needs that? I'm never going to England.
A hundred bucks! For a comic book? Who drew it, Micha-malangelo?
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| Posted by Glenn Flanagan on 14-Aug-2005 | Quotes from Mark Twain"They spell it Vinci and pronounce it Vinchy, foreigners always spell
better than they pronounce."
"CLASSIC, a book which people praise and do not read."
"In Boston they ask, 'How much does he know?' In New York, 'How much is he
worth?' In Philadelphia, 'Who were his parents?'"
"Put all your eggs in the one basket and WATCH THAT BASKET"
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| Posted by Jim Smith on 14-Aug-2005 | Bill Gates640K ought to be enough for anybody -Bill Gates,1981
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| Posted by Chris S. Porter on 14-Aug-2005 | funny quotes..* Keep death of the roads drive on the pavements...
* Cinderella married for money.....
* Humpdy dumpty was pushed.....
* In other countries people pray in the street, in this country they call
them pedestrians.....
* We need old friends to grow up,and new ones to stay young..
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| Posted by Christian t. Rios on 14-Aug-2005 | Bo Hansson (Swedish Commentator)"Dunga takes Baggio from behind...they know each othert since the time in
Fiorentina." Bo Hansson WC-final 1994
"It took in the stomach...very far down in the stomach...it hurts very
much when the ball hits that far down in the stomach." Bo Hansson about a
tennisplayer who has understood the meaning of 'New Balls please'
"It doesn't matter how the game ends as long as the standings doesn't
change." Bo Hansson
"Zubizareta gets the ball over the post!" Bo Hansson
"The runner is running incredible fast...and he falls!!!!!!Oh, excuse me,
it was a longjumper." Bo Hansson, 400 hurdle final, EC 1982
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| Posted by Horse's Heaven on 14-Aug-2005 | EverythingYou can't have everything. Where would you put it?
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