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| Posted by jacob l. sams on 12-Aug-2005 | Yankee Hater 1Q: What has 400 feet and 3 teeth?
A: The first row of the bleachers at Yankee Stadium.
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| Posted by Yo Momma on 11-Aug-2005 | Golf "is" a Drag!Bob and his three golf buddies were out playing and were just starting on the back nine when Bob paused, looked down the fairway and began to sob uncontrollably.
The other three gathered around him and asked: Whats wrong? Bob looked down at his feet, sniffed and dried his eyes some, then apologized for his emotional outburst. Im sorry, I always get emotional at this hole - it holds very difficult memories for me.
One of his buddies asked: What happened? What could have gotten you so upset?
Bob stared silently off in the distance, then said in a low voice, This is where my wife and I were playing 12 years ago when she suddenly died of a heart attack; right at this very hole!
Oh my God, the other golfers said; That must have been horrible!
Horrible? You think it`s horrible?
Bob cried in disbelief; It was worse than that!!!!
Every hole for the rest of the day, all the way back to the clubhouse it was hit the ball, drag Alice, hit the ball, drag Alice...
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| Posted by Some One on 14-Aug-2005 | Dallas CowboysQ:What do you say to a Dallas Cowboy in a suit?
A:And how does the defendent wish to plead?
Q: What do you call a drug ring in Dallas?
A: A huddle
Q: Four Dallas Cowboys in a car, who's driving?
A: The police
Q: Why can't Michael Irvin get in a huddle on the field anymore?
A: It's a parole violation to associate with known felons.
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| Posted by Jessika on 14-Aug-2005 | The WNBAYou: Want to hear a joke?
He/she: Sure.
You: The WNBA.
You: Want to hear another joke?
He/she: Sure.
You: Competitive WNBA.
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| Posted by Glor on 11-Aug-2005 | Celebrity Golf MatchStevie Wonder and Jack Nicklaus are in a bar. Stevie mentions that they ought to get together and play a few holes.
"You play golf?!" asks Jack.
Stevie says, "Yes, I have been playing for years."
"But I thought you were blind; how can you play golf if you are blind?" Jack asks.
"I get my caddie to stand in the middle of the fairway and he calls to me. I listen for the sound of his voice and play the ball towards him, then when I get to where the ball lands the caddie moves to the green or further down the fairway and again I play the ball towards his voice," explains Stevie.
"But how do you putt?" Nicklaus wondered.
"Well," says Stevie, "I get my caddie to lean down in front of the hole and call to me with his head on the ground and I just play the ball to the sound of his voice."
Nicklaus says, "What is your handicap?"
"Well, I play off scratch," Stevie assures Jack. Nicklaus is incredulous and says to Stevie, "We must play a game sometime."
Wonder replies, "Well, people don't take me seriously so I only play for money, and I never play for less than $100,000 a hole."
Nicklaus thinks it over and says, "OK, I'm up for that. When would you like to play?"
Stevie replies "I don't care - any night next week is OK with me."
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| Posted by rebekah on 10-Aug-2005 | He's so fastIs your new striker fast?'
`Is he fast? He's so fast, the rest of the team have to run twice as fast just
to keep up with him!'
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